Be Ridiculously Good at Life

The introverts vs. extroverts war needs to stop. As the Introvert Movement is gaining momentum, a plethora of articles glorifying introverts and attacking their more outward-focused counterparts has been suffocating the internet. Propagation of stereotypes, muddled definitions, and faulty cross-referencing spread like a virus infecting those in need of identity. The theory of introversion and extroversion is just that- a theory. Originally popularized, and badly muddled since, by the psychologist Carl Jung, introversion and extroversion were defined as behaviors. Introversion is defined as  an "attitude-type characterized by orientation in life through subjective psychic contents" (focus on one's inner psychic activity); and extraversion is defined  as "an attitude type characterized by concentration of interest on the external object" (the outside world). Behavior, not identity, is the basis behind the introversion-extroversion continuum. To think in terms of b...

I'm a fan of Mark Manson's "Fuck Yes or No" rule . This rule states that if you don't say "Fuck Yes!" to a proposition, then it is a no. This means that if you aren't totally enthusiastic about someone or something, then don't go for it. If you meet someone and you don't feel that "fuck yes" positivity towards being their friend/date/business partner, then don't go for it. Of course, this requires an open mind and a quiet ego and a developed intuition to really work. An open mind, quiet ego, and developed intuition are essential to a good life, regardless of whether one adopts the Fuck Yes or No rule, so definitely work on those aspects first before trying to make the rule work and having it fail because all the mental/emotional/ego clutter gets in the way. The Fuck Yes or No rule begs for further examination and alignment. To really apply this rule to all aspects of your life, you really need to take it to the next level: expec...

As a very free spirited and relatively care free person, I approach all of my relationships with a certain openness and flexibility. I try not to project expectations onto family or friends or partners. I respect the fact that people have very different ways of showing their love, affection, and support. I embrace the fact that people seek out connection and expression in various ways, and I am honest enough with myself to recognize that certain people's natural affinities complement my own. Despite all of this, I still can't avoid getting hurt. One theme that has been causing me some social grief ever since middle school has been the awkward unrequited friend attraction. I make a friend. We get along super well. I make it very well known that my romantic interests lie on someone else, because that's the truth. We stay friends. Then one day, I am made known of my friend's sexual or romantic desire. I make it known that those feelings are unreciprocated as gently as poss...

Romantic apathy is a dull, aching pain that weighs down your heart in spite of all of the freedom it claims to offer. You just don't care. No one gets to you. No one makes you feel anything. Interactions are empty. Pleasure can't be sustained in this state, so it is chased after within the confines of quick fixes and half hearted attempts to make a connection. It is never enough. Maybe you got burnt. Maybe your heart got broken. Maybe you saw things that made you never want to be vulnerable. Maybe you've never truly let someone in, or maybe the person who you considered home made some very hurtful decisions that left you feeling betrayed and angry and hopeless. Maybe you were counting on someone and all the weight of your blind faith toppled them off of their pedestal. And now you feel very alone. You feel alone despite all of your efforts. Maybe you're a machine now, performing once meaningful acts in the most mechanical of ways. That gesture that once held so much ten...

Labeling one's surroundings is a strongly rooted habit- we subconsciously organize our environment into categories which help us "survive." From a survivalist viewpoint, this tendency is extremely helpful- we must label that area of the forest as dangerous, the members of a neighboring tribe as friendly or lethal, and that body of water as impure. Arriving at quick conclusions when facing crucial survival situations is useful and promotes our well-being, but when that same tendency is practiced in a totally nonthreatening environment (e.g. our social lives), we actually hinder the flow of our happiness. How We Organize the People Around Us Most of us constantly form observations about others within the first few seconds of meeting them. Their appearance, body language, and general "vibe" seem to communicate to us their personalities. This alone, in its "pure" act, is a very harmless exercise. There is nothing wrong with deducing a person's emotions...

Love is an energy. Love is a state of total acceptance, harmony, and truth. True love with another individual is virtually impossible unless one truly loves themselves. This self love requires an honest and deliberate look into one's self and inner environment in order to be accessed.  Tuning Into the Flow Love resonates from within first- any attempts at finding love outside of the self are futile and shall create new bonds, associations,and expectations that will cause suffering and disappointment. Accept Yourself We can not truly accept others if we do not accept ourselves. Self acceptance demands detachment from the illusory qualities we define ourselves with. You are not your life story. You are not the emotions you feel, the problems you solve, the job you work, the friends you keep, the country you're from.  You are not your favorite sports team, your weekly/nightly/daily/monthly/yearly habits, your interests and hobbies, your talents, your achievements, your successes,...